This is me streaky!!!!!!!!

Let me just say to all girls out there spray tanning booths may seem like fabulous inventions, but they are not as glamorous as they seem on the TV. The Friends rendition is much more accurate. I’m sharing all this information because last night I decided that I should try out this lovely invention out and see what all the buzz was about! So I read up on the internet about what I need to do before to ensure I get the best experience possible (yeah I’m a dork). So after work I go home take a shower and exfoliate my skin as to remove all the dead skin cells to obtain a less blotchy tan. So I head over to my local tanning salon where I’ve tanned before and walk in thinking this was gonna be a breeze! So the manager takes me to the room with the booth and starts into his 12in thick manual (at least in my mind that’s what he was reading) about all the things that I need to do and it went a little something like this.
- get undressed – this was by far the easiest part
- put on the hair net past your hairline not below, or you’ll look stupid
- use this lotion cover your feet, in between your toes, the balls of your feet, oh and your Achilles tendon, and the tops of your feet, or you’ll look stupid
- use the same lotion about 7 squirts to cover you hands, get it in good in between your fingers and saturate your hands, or you’ll look stupid (this is one step that I obviously did not do correctly because, well, my hands look stupid)
- when you are in the booth make sure to stand with your arms down, then your right arm up, then your left, turn around when it tells you, hold your right arm up again, then your left (I believe it was at this point that I started to worry that this was a bit to complicated for me, with much too permanent ramifications because of my idiocy)
- when you get out use the small towel to wipe off your hands well, or you’ll look stupid, then use the big towel to pat dry the mist that’s on your body
- when you walk out go to the bathroom and wash your hands, only your fingers and palms though not the top part, or you’ll look stupid
- now to get in wave your hand in front of the sensor to open the booth door (obviously I’m invisible because I’m standing there naked, with my hair net thing on, slathered up with lotion on my hands and feet and waving my hand around after about 15 times of me trying it did it, oh and don’t worry that there was another sensor in the booth to start the spray that also thought I was invisible
- ok, so I’m in the booth the voice instructions are counting down for when the spray starts and it begins this is the part that is not as glamorous as they let on, that stuff sprays at you hard and fast and it’s none to fun to breath in either
- this is another moment when I’m shocked by the intensity of the spray and I start to worry about not getting this stuff evenly sprayed on me, lest I look like Ross! So I start doing the dance right arm up left arm up turn around do it again, sounds like a kids song huh?
- so it stops and I feel disgusting because of the reference I made about patting the mist off your body, yeah, it’s not exactly a mist you are wet I mean really wet! It’s not dripping wet, but it’s like when you walk under those cooler misters at an amusement park your not wet but your not damp either so I step out of the booth onto the towel they have laid out, all wet and smelly, yeah it smells. So I do this cute little shuffle thing so I don’t have to get off of the towel and get my small towel and my large towel and pat dry.
- I get dressed and wash my hands and leave feeling slightly satisfied with my adventure, thinking I followed all the rules bring on that beautiful golden tan!

Fast forward a couple of hours as I’m about ready to crawl in bed, I have noticed a slight change in my skin a color change that I was satisfied with! You go Mysitc Tan!

Fast forward to when I wake up and walk into my bathroom and look in the mirror, WOW I’m tan!!! My face looks darker and skin looks great… oh wait my hands… crap…. Streaky, but that’s life right? Wait for it... what’s that on my arm, yep, big white streak on my elbow, how it got there, or should I say how the spray didn’t get there, I don’t know. Pulling my hair back to get some water to rinse my mouth after brushing my teeth, is that a shadow, nope big dark streak on my neck, good thing I have long hair! So needless to say it was a learning experience. Would I do it again, I don’t know, was it worth it, sure – it only lasts about 5 to 7 days, I can handle looking stupid that long right?

Blasted – For the weather getting absolutely gorgeous for only a day and a half
Yippee – My friends are coming into town to shop for bridesmaid dresses for my wedding and having a late celebration of my birthday!!!!!!!!!!